Saturday, January 9, 2010
Saturday, January 09, 2010
you said you are there for me
but when I really open up to you , you just don’t want to see
you act like you care
but when I have these thoughts and break downs I ring and you are never there
you don’t know what It’s like, to want to die
take the rope, f**k life and hold on tight
when I tell you I want to die, it’s no word of a lie
it's all building up, I’m weak, I just want to surrender the fight
I can’t sleep at night, can’t sleep anymore
my constant pain, my constant heart sore
all the thoughts of death, I have and suicide
I tell you about them, why do you expect me to hide
I thought you were the one I could turn to when it got too much
well you could have fooled me, my feelings you don’t want to touch
I will just stay away, I get it, crystal clear
but one day suicide will take over, then maybe you will realize my fear
it's ok, I get it, it's not happening to you
so it’s not a big deal, get over it, let it pass through
here’s the thing I have to say, now it’s my turn to speak
never push me too far
cuz one day I’ll be weak
and found dead on the bed
please don’t push me too far
you never tried to understand this pain yet you pretend you understand everything.
you never realise the pain inside me all along.
all you did was to stay there and listen and do nothing.
stop pretending when you doesnt know anything.
Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.
Saturday, January 09, 2010
Sometimes, I often wonder why something shouts as loud as thunder
It was there inside of me, hiding for a reason
Sometimes, I looked at the sky and hurtle a cry
Maybe because of hurt but still, I'm wondering why
As I waked up in the morning, the light blinds me from darkness
my heart is filled with such sadness
I am an ordinary person with a broken heart and shame everywhere
I can't believe this pain inside and shame elsewhere
These unexpressed feelings of mine will never let me be fine
I hope tomorrow as I looked up the sky,
all my doubts, pain and hurt will die
Tears should not fall from this eyes again and again...
Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Monday, January 04, 2010
First day of school.. B.O.R.E.D
That's the only feeling you can get for the first day of school. lol.
Now in class. Really nothing to do. I wanna go back home and sleep. -.-
Why is it so freaking bored.
I want that FCUK shirt. Gonna get it ASAP. lol.
Cool as FCUK..
Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Sunday, January 03, 2010
你不在
當我最需要愛
你卻不在
無盡等待像獨白的難捱
你不在
高興還是悲哀
你都不在
我受了傷再偷偷好起來
但你不在
不在
What else can I do?
Whenever I need you yet you are not there.
Happy or Sad, you are still not there.
It's just like I am no longer in your mind.
Yeah. This is the problem I have been facing for about one year.
This should stop, I guess.
This pain, I shall cover it up. No longer bringing it up.
Even if I brought it up. Nobody would seems to be bothered to help.
It's nothing to them yet it's everything to me.
So, maybe it's my fault as I have been stuck for too long.
Lesson for the year :
Never expose a wound for too long.
Just let it heal by itself...
(It may seems great but there's some side effects)
Everything have its own advantages and disadvantages.
Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.
Sunday, January 03, 2010
New life was born. Perhaps.
Everything going to change.
Shall not stop it after taking the first step.
I got lots of stuffs to complete by June.
That's my goal. :)
No matter what happen, nothing is going to stop me.
After June, everything is going to be great for me.
I have plan all these last year. This shall be the great year for me. lol.
Shall post them out after completing them.
Lets get prepared for the great news this June.
Probably, I will stop blogging too.
Remembered, JUNE.
This coming June. :)
Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.