emokid life.

~~Wednesday, May 27, 2009~~

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

my life.
time for a change.
been stucked too long.
damn long yeah.
shall move on now.
but still emo-ing..
maybe it will go off soon.

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Tuesday, May 26, 2009~~

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

avoided. i guess this avoiding is not useful anyway.
just not that good also.
never ever try something foolish anymore.>.<
theres something i wanna say so much right now.
but doesnt really how to say it out.
tomorrow no school, shall stay home and think about it.
getting seriously tired.
when to stay awake?!
argh.
seems like i have not been doing well this few days
shall try to be better on thursday..
time to go le. cyas.
EMO-ing in progress~

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Monday, May 25, 2009~~

Monday, May 25, 2009

decided to change something.
some thoughts in my mind while heading home in the bus today.
maybe i should keep a distance more from her.
i could not really bring myself to face her anymore.
just keep a distance for a time being
i am still unsure of the path i am heading
thats too much of a pain
didnt wanna get her to talk to me anymore
cause, i am tired
everything taken for granted?
hopefully not

nvm, tomorrow shall have a change
no more joking stuffs
cause right now, i am not even have that mood
i have been trying to hide this stupid feelings
but it always overcomes me -___-
now, having fears here and there
guys, dont compliment me or say bad things about me
this is what i fear
advices advice advices
i am scare of that now
i need a break too.
but still gonna attend school
cause life is a learning
must not missed it
even if you didnt get to understand the whole thing,
you did learn something new..
enough over here
this time really emo-ing
serious
dont trust me? thats your business then
dont try to irritates me either
it wont do you good too.
ciaos~

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

Monday, May 25, 2009

How emo are you?

You are 67% Emo!

You are pretty Emo. You like the music, styles and way of life but it doesn't really control your life. There is more to you than just another cute Emo face.

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Sunday, May 24, 2009~~

Sunday, May 24, 2009

hmm. decided to change a new blog skin.
why is that so? cause that previous skin doesnt show how much i feels >.<
right now, having a bad mood..
dont ask me why, cause it is always the same reason.
why is it that i missed her and wanna talk to her a lot when she is not around.
when she is around, i couldnt bring myself to talk to her..=X

i hate to be depressed..
now falling sick again..
body getting weaker each day.
when will i get to move on?. i am stuck down here.
somebody help me..
i need a listening ear.
i dont need advices right now.
sorry to those guys whom have been listening to my ranting.
i dont need advices from you all right now.
cause my mood overcomes me and i get fed up easily >.<
sorry guys..i dont mean it.

就算再付出
我都撑得住
我不怕辛苦
苦到什么地
步只要你满足
但你何时满足
爱的好累
真的好苦
虽然你是我的一切
也别让我感觉
爱你很可悲
从来听不见你一句赞美
从来听不见你一句安慰
就算我作的都白费
至少自尊让我保留一点

do you know that?
you can make me happier.
you can also make me super sad.
do you know that whatever you said,
it will hurt a lots?
how i wish i can stop talking to you..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Saturday, May 23, 2009~~

Saturday, May 23, 2009

decided to post now..
cause i am damn free right now.
i hate free time..
cause every seconds, she would be in my mind..
damn.
how i wish she could be thinking of me.
well she dont.
i cant blame her for making me like this.
i can only blame myself for falling for her.
my biggest fault is to fall for her..>.<

i did slash myself whenever she said some bad things about me.=X
i did slash myself whenever i said something hurtful to her.
i couldnt make her happy anymore,
cause my heart is filled with hatreds.
how i wish i could get her off my mind..

hopefully she will understand one day
when she realise that she missing something, it would be me
and sadly, when she realise she is losing something, i am already lost.

saw something while catching a show yesterday night.
i wonder how long i never watch television..Zzz.
this is the quote i got from the show.
"we need time to build up trust, but can lose it overnight"
thats the word..cool.
trust trust trust.
i lost it.
where can i find that >.<

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Thursday, May 21, 2009~~

Thursday, May 21, 2009

One step ahead and I am gonna fall into depression.>.<
Stopping myself from depression..Can i do that?
I doubt so..
Super EMO nowadays..
negative thoughts have been moving around my mind..
asking myself "wheres my penknife.."
god. how am i going to stop that..-_-
super stressed up with this and that.
no more concentrations..
no mood to do stuffs.
totally dont have the mood to move on.
my life is stuck again.

The warmth I feel beside me is slowly fading..
i feel that the distance is getting further..
i cant take it anymore.
how i wish i could stop myself from feeling all these..
emoing is not what i want.
*sigh..*
the pain inside me..
is very easy to describe.
try slashing yourself with penknife and you will be able to feel the pain i am feeling..>.<

The path I walk is in the wrong direction

when can i find the right path..-_-

this is what i wanna tell her right now.

"i was born to tell you I love you and I am torn to do what I have to"

back to emo-ing..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Wednesday, May 20, 2009~~

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Letting go does not mean giving up but accepting that there are things that cannot be.
Has your heart ever wanted to ask something, but your mind was scared of the answer?

Been stuck too long..
Letting go would help to resolve everything.
Life still move on.
I may smile and laugh, but that's my only way of hiding.

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Monday, May 18, 2009~~

Monday, May 18, 2009

I wish I had your pair of wings
had them last night in my dreams
I was chasing butterflies
till the sunrise broke my eyes
Tonight the sky has glued my eyes
cause what they see's an angel hive
I've got to touch that magic sky
and greet the angels in their hive
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
Sometimes I wish I were you
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
Sometimes I wish I were you
All the sweet honey from above
pour it all over me sweet love
And while you're flying around my head
your honey kisses keep me fed
I wish I had your pair of wings
just like last night in my dreams
I was lost in paradise
wish I'd never opened my eyes
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
sometimes I wish I were you
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
sometimes I wish I were you
But there's danger in the air
tryin'so hard to be unfair
Danger's in the air
tryin' so hard to give us a scare
but we're not afraid
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
sometimes I wish I were you
Sometimes I wish I were an angel
sometimes I wish I were you
Wish I were you , Oh I wish I were you

motivation! finally. the light is here..>.<
But there's danger in the air
tryin'so hard to be unfair
Danger's in the air
tryin' so hard to give us a scare
but we're not afraid
i will try my best to overcome them!:)
moving on to a better life, NOT the past me..xD
no more living in the past. life CHANGED. >.<

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Wednesday, May 13, 2009~~

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Avoid.. hope that it would get better.
perhaps i think too..想太多..
sigh.
getting emo day by day. love hurts. >.<
so, i am confused. i dont know what to do..=(

你笑着说
他是朋友但
你眼中太温柔
我的不安
那么沉重
只有你不懂
他霸占了你的心中
属于我的角落
所以你说
我们
不是你和我
是我想太多
你总这样说
但你却沒有
真的心疼我
是我想太多
我也这样说
这是唯一能安慰我的理由

did i think too much?..
time will tell..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Monday, May 11, 2009~~

Monday, May 11, 2009

emo emo emo - ing
o.O
what is wrong with me..
missing somebody~
who is that? i dont even know.-__-
yeah. i am lost.
missing someone so badly that i lost my concentration.
how can i find out the answer?
mind is filled with troubles~
shall go emo..>.<

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Friday, May 8, 2009~~

Friday, May 08, 2009

take a breath,I’ll pull myself together.
Just another step until I reach the door
you’ll never know the way,
it tears me up inside to see you
I wish that I could tell you something
to take it all away.
Sometimes I wish I could save you
and there’s so many things that I want you to know
I won’t give up till it’s over
if it takes you forever,
I want you to know
when I hear your voice,
it’s drowning in the whispers
your just skin and bones
there’s nothing left to take
and no matter what I do
I can’t make you feel better
if only I could find the answer
to help me understand
Sometimes I wish I could save you
and there’s so many things that I want you to know
I won’t give up till it’s over
if it takes you forever,
I want you to know
That, if you fall, stumble down,
I’ll pick you up off the ground.
If you lose faith in you,
I’ll give you strength to pull through.
Tell me you won’t give up,
cause I’ll be waiting here if you fall
you know I’ll be there for you
If only I could find the answer,
to take it all away
Sometimes I wish I could save you
and there’s so many things that I want you to know
I won’t give up till it’s over
if it takes you forever,
I want you to know
I wish I could save you...
I want you to know...
I wish I could save you...

This song suddenly appeared in my mind.
I hope to tell her this..sigh.
I guess the timing is wrong.
I am so confused right now
Stuck down here.
Should I wait or should I do something to it?=(
"That, if you fall, stumble down,I’ll pick you up off the ground.If you lose faith in you,I’ll give you strength to pull through.Tell me you won’t give up,cause I’ll be waiting here if you fall, you know I’ll be there for you"
Do you know that? *Sigh*

Anyway, THANKS Ryan for his help with my PP..haha.
ICE MOCHA FOR YOU.xD
lol... PP is just so tiring, complicating and STRESSFUL..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

~~Saturday, May 2, 2009~~

Saturday, May 02, 2009

COMPLETLY EMOed..
I pretend to be happy so I don't have to explain myself to people who'll never understand.

Some people wear their smiles like a disguise. Those people who smile a lot, watch their eyes. I know cause I'm like that a lot. You think everything's okay, and it is till it's not.

You never see my tears, but that doesn't mean I don't cry. You never feel my pain, but that doesn't mean I don't hurt. You only see me smile, and that doesn't mean that I am happy.

Sometimes, i received a question from others. " Go look for your friends?", " Where's your friends?"
I dont know how to answer it..
Where are my friends? Suddenly gone...
FRIENDS? I HAVE NO FRIENDS NOW..
I could sense the feeling of death right now..
emo-ing in progress..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.