THE OWNER;

I'm here alone
thinking about my life,
People don't understand me,

I don't understand them either.
Never did, never will.

Carlson, 25thOCT
Nick: ahCoW
FRIENDSTER
just an emokid

INTERESTS;
LIKES: LOYALTY
HONESTY
PEACE
Green apple and Mango
HATES: BETRAYER
BACKSTABBER
LIAR

EMO song;

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SCREAMS;


CBOX :D

LINKS;

Audrey.
Alice.
Asyura.
Brenda.
Chanel.
Dexter.
Guo Ming.
Hui Lee.
Ivan.
James.
Jia Yi ; meimei.
Kitty.
Lisa.
Minghee.
Raymond.
Ruoyi.
Ryan.
Sfyqah.
Shane.
Shawn.
Sharon.
ShiQi.
Shortisa.
ShiWei.
Shuyu.
Siti Shahira.
Sumin.
Tingyuan.
Wendy.
Winnie.
Xinyi.
Yew Suan.
Ying Yi.

MEMORIES;

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 May 2010

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Deviantart Brushes

Sunday, December 14, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
'Cause no one else cares
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here
So if you're asking me I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shed when I'm near
I'm strong to surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to have so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me
From myself
I can't be who you are

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to have so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me
From myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are


kinda like this song alot now..
can show my feelings..>.<
perhaps there are some meaning i wanna tell her..=X
missed..
things get better in time please..

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Hmm..have not been posting for long time..
this post is gonna be long..=)
my 75th post..xD
the longest of all bah..lols.

Well..today i going to write a story..
here it goes..

Once upon a time, there used to be 3 friends, B, C and K who used to be very close. But on one fine day, K started to find out that B and C were not calling her out or talking to her anymore. She started to ponder the answer but to not avail. K is a person who would express everything out on her blog and it would be so detailed that it does not leave out a single word of what pleasant or unpleasant things that she had experienced. When B and C virtually did not contact or find K at all, she started to write all about that into her blog. But have she ever thought of what was going on and the reason behind all these events. THE ONLY THING K DID WAS TO POST EVERYTHING ON THE BLOG AND HOPE THE PROBLEM SOLVE BY ITSELF? Apparently it seems to be this case. Initially, what B and C intend to do is to keep everything within the 3 of them and wait till 3 of them is in a calm manner to thrash things out privately at the right time. But K left them with no choice when K posted everything up on her blog and virtually expose everything to the whole world, leaving B and C with no choice but to come out to tell their side of the story.
So what did K did to cause all these to happen? Whenever K talk to C, K will always ‘suan’ C and C will always feel Sian as K has made the whole conversation boring. This cause C to have the impression that K will always suan C whenever C talk to K and thus, C will start to talk very little or don even talk to K. Whenever that B and C were having their casual conversation or joking around or even suan-ing each other about girls, when they try to involve K in it, K will always have that serious look and serious tone and it really spoils the mood or atmosphere. It sometimes really pissed B to an extent that he does not want to even talk to K anymore. It will be even worse when they would try to involve K in their joke about girls or boys. She would just give that dam fucking black face and that will seriously cause everyone to be affected and they would even be in no mood to continue to talk or does anything as B n C feel sian after what K has done. There would be even times when K went out with B and C, or even with other friends and whenever she showed that emo face of hers, she seriously affect the mood of those who were there. (If you think that you are being emo at that point of time, please try to control it as it is not considerate to affect others mood. U can have your problems, but what makes you think that others do not have theirs. No one is stopping you from giving attitude or being emo, BUT IN THE PROCESS DON AFFECT THE MOOD OF EVERYONE AROUND YOU.) K also gives B and C the impression that she looks down on them. Once ,when B ask for her opinion about a girl, K simply tell B that B is wasting his time and that B is not compatible with her. K even tells B that she is laughing dam hard when B told K that he was hoping for a result. It is not that B is angry that K gives her frank opinion. It is the way of how she views B that seriously disappoints B.
K also tends to keep things to herself and refuse to tell others about her view and no one knows what K is thinking at times or who K was angry with at that time. An example is that there was once that B wanted to leave early as he felt lesson was boring and his eye was pain. When he told C and K that he had already told his teacher that he was leaving at the second break, C and K ask him why he did not want to present his presentation first before he left, B answered back that he had already tell his teacher and that his teacher wanted him to see the doctor about his eye problem, thus asking B to leave at the second break. C and K then agree with B going WP first as B argued that it would be boring to stay in the school to wait for them and that C and K would need to return to class during the break to prepare for their presentation. B later found a friend, X (banana) who was willing to accompany B at WP to wait for C and K to arrive. When B told C and K about that, C was jokingly saying that B would ignore them when they reach WP. That was the time when K started to say that she was dam pissed off. When C asked out of a nice intention what K was pissed off at, K actually ticked C off and told him that it was damm obvious. It was pretty obvious at that time that K was actually pissed off with B that he was going to WP to look for X. But K did not say why she was pissed off with B for looking for X. Whatever the reason, why should K be pissed off in the first place. Doesn’t B have the right to go and find his friends at all? C and K finally arrived at WP 45 mins late of the time they promise to arrive at. Knowing K was having a black face, B ask C why were they so late instead. Actually C was also of victim like B. C actually waited close to 20 mins in the school for K to find him.
In addition to this, from the beginning, B and C did not even know why K had tagged along with them wherever they go. But due to the nice nature of C characteristic, C persuaded B to let K tag along with them so that K would not feel lonely. At first, B and C try to accommodate K to join them although B and C felt very weird about it. They really did their best but they found out that they couldn’t really accommodate K no matter how much time they used. This is evident whenever they went out together, they did not really have much things to say to K or they felt bored of saying anything after K has said something that spoil their mood. There were also times that C felt bored of lessons or unmotivated after seeing his grades. K did not motivate him and sometimes, even suan him.
Finally, B felt that it was time to move on as he was disappointed and he could sense C unhappiness towards K. Therefore, B and C started to avoid her to cool everything down and wait for an appropriate time to thrash things out with her privately. But after what K had done, it left B n C with no choice.
C merely agree with the plan as C was afraid that he would be soft hearted and go back to that unhappy friendship of theirs. B had to be selfish as he had no choice, but to sacrifice K interest for the sake of B and C interest. If he had not done so, then B would have to sacrifice both his n C interest in order to accommodate K. So judge for yourself, is B and C really wrong to do so.

That’s the end of the story.. In fact, there are still more.. I am lazy to type it out..haha.
Thanks for reading this story as it takes up your precious time =) have a nice day ahead.

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

Friday, December 5, 2008
Friday, December 05, 2008

blogs...
what makes people to create blog?
what makes them to post on their blog?
isnt it suppose to be more focus on those things that are not private?
why do some people like to post all those private stuffs and let other people look at it?
i think it is invading our privacy instead..

private should be settled privately, isnt it?
why must it show so clearly to others what is happening?
if you really need an answer, please ask?
clear your doubts before you start worrying..
worry for small things, you are just simply exagerrating..
this is just wasting people time and never even think about what they feel..

just a view about blogs..
troubles and troubles created because of this.
CRAP!
why they never thought about the consequences when they post it?=.=

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.

Monday, December 1, 2008
Monday, December 01, 2008

just finish understanding those VB codes..
Damn difficult to understand..STRESS..=X
i guess this is the only thing that i can do to forget everything..
FORGET is the best thing to stay happy..
not for awhile, but forever..=)
stay happy is the best thing to stay alive..lol.
this is the life that everyone should be like..
get rid of those unhappiness..
dont let unhappiness kill your day..=)
live your life to the fullest..xD


and..
too many things that i wanna buy right now..=)
hoodies,tees,berms,shoes,belt,studs,etc..
really damn alot for me to name them down..
hahas.
have been a long time since i walk around TOWN..
lols..holidays are coming!
my 3 weeks break is gonna arrive!!lols.
looking forward to christmas celebration =)
cya guys! xD

Everything I've believed in, has lied to me.